Navigating Loss with a Memory Box
When experiencing grief, finding ways to honour and remember those we have lost can enable us to stay connected to our loved ones, and help us to heal. A memory box, a personal and heartfelt collection of items that remind us of our loved one, can serve as a tangible connection to the memories we cherish. Let us guide you through creating a memory box, and possible items to include. Please note that there is no right or wrong way to create a memory box, it is completely personal; we are just here to offer some ideas if you’re feeling a little stuck.
What is a memory box?
A memory box is more than just a container of objects; it's a way to externalize your grief and memories, allowing you to engage with your loved ones actively, which can be a crucial step in the healing process. By curating a collection of meaningful items, you create a space where love continues to live, fostering a sense of closeness and comfort whenever you need it most.
How to Create Your Memory Box
1. Choosing Your Box
Start with selecting a box that feels right to you. It could be something simple or elaborate, new or an item that belonged to your loved one. The size should accommodate the items you wish to include, but its appearance is entirely up to your personal preference and connection to the person you're remembering.
2. Personalizing the Box
Personalize the box in a way that reflects your loved one's personality, your relationship with them, or simply something that brings you comfort. This can be through decoration, painting, or attaching photos, quotes, or fabric on the outside of the box.
What to Include in Your Memory Box
Creating a memory box is a deeply personal process, and what you include should resonate with your relationship with your lost loved one. Here are some suggestions to get you started:
1. Photographs
Choose photos that capture happy times, significant moments, or everyday life. These frozen slices of time can bring back a wealth of feelings and memories.
2. Letters or Cards
Include any letters, cards, or notes exchanged between you and your loved one. You can also write a new letter expressing the things you wish you could say now.
3. Clothing or Fabric
A piece of clothing, like a favorite shirt, scarf, or any fabric item that holds their scent or reminds you of them, can be incredibly comforting.
4. Personal Items
This could be anything from a watch, a piece of jewelry, to their favorite book or a mug they loved. These items carry the essence of their personality and passions and can evoke strong memories.
5. Shared Memories
Seek out tickets from a concert you attended together, a souvenir from a trip, or even a recipe card for a dish you enjoyed making together. These items celebrate your shared experiences.
6. Voice Recordings or Videos
If you have voice mails, audio recordings, or videos, consider including a digital player or USB drive with these files in the box. Hearing their voice or seeing their movements can be incredibly powerful.
7. A Memory Stick or Playlist
If music was a big part of their life or your shared experiences, creating a playlist of their favorite songs or songs that remind you of them can be a comforting addition.
8. Scented Items
A small bottle of their perfume, cologne, or even a soap they loved can evoke memories through the powerful sense of smell.
9. A Map of a Special Place
A map highlighting a place you loved to explore together or a destination that held special significance in their life or your relationship.
10. Special Occasion Reminders
Items from important life events, such as a wedding, graduation, or milestone birthdays. This could be an invitation, a dried flower, or a decorative item from the event.
11. A Personal Recipe
A recipe card for a dish they were famous for or loved to make. It could also be a recipe for a meal you enjoyed together, offering a tangible way to share memories through taste.
12. Collective Contributions
Invite friends and family to write down a memory, a message, or a wish they had for your loved one. These can be sealed in individual envelopes and opened when you seek connection or comfort.
13. A Diary or Journal Entries
If your loved one kept a diary or journal, including a few entries or the journal itself can be a way to remember them in their own words.
Conclusion
Remember, each item added to the memory box should resonate with your feelings and memories of your loved one, serving as a bridge to the moments you shared. This process is deeply personal; there's no right or wrong way to create your memory box. It's a tribute to the relationship you cherished and a testament to the love that continues beyond physical presence.